Third and Long

I’m not calling myself an expert in offensive line coaching, nor am I a quarterback specialist…but I’m pretty  sure that Jon Kitna should not be in that position…and neither should his helmet or the rest of his ragdollish body. 

Looking at today’s title, aside from a few standout quarterbacks (Brett Favre, Bart Starr, Jim McMahon, Fran Tarkenton, and healthy Daunte Culpepper), the NFC North has mostly been known for its standout defenses and not so much its quarterback play. Well, possibly because of collusion between NFC North owners, if the formula isn’t broken, don’t fix it, so the NFC North currently has 1.75 competent quarterbacks out of 4. Confused with that number? So am I, so let’s break it down!

Green Bay (2-1) has a top five defense to match a top ten offense, with Ryan Grant in the backfield and veteran Donald Driver as well as James Jones and Greg Jennings lining up at the receiver positions. Aaron Rodgers, the man trying to dig himself out of the Favre shadow, has shown himself in his past three starts (and in his efficient performance against Dallas last year) to be the sole competent quarterback in the NFC North. Congrats, Aaron! All those years on the bench finally paid off…I guess. 

1 Quarterback

With Jon Kitna at the helm, the Lions (0-3) have been…well, basically awful. Their opponents have almost doubled them in points, they’ve yet to get a win, and Matt Millen wants the team to “stay the course”…meaning that as long as there’s a place in Hell for Millen, the Lions will stay the course there with him. The saddest part about the mess in Detroit is the fact that Jon Kitna is a semi-competent quarterback. He realizes that with two freaks as wideouts in Calvin Johnson and Roy Williams that he can play pitch and catch and still throw for 250 yards a game. The downside? Teams realize this, and since Detroit has neither the running game of an NFC North team nor the defense, opposing defenses also only need to play pitch and catch.

1.5 Quarterbacks

The Minnesota Vikings (1-2) for a lot of people were supposed to be the NFL’s dark horse team, one that would snatch the NFC North from Green Bay’s expecting, Favre-less hands. Of course, then Tarvaris Jackson took the first snap from center for the 2008 season, and now the team resides at 1-2, with Jackson no longer the starter? The starter? Gus Frerotte, the man known for…running his head into a wall during a Monday Night Football game, spraining his neck…on purpose. Hmm…with my options being that or Jackson, with a 12-17 touchdown/INT ratio for his career…I choose to take my own life.

1.75 Quarterbacks

So seriously. It can’t get worse that the quarterbacking situation for the Vikings…can it? Well, let me introduce you to the Chicago Bears (1-2). A team that has had quarterbacking problems the past three years, 2008 training camp had the quarterbacks starting preseason games and being decided the starter after…a coin flip. I wish I was joking. When undrafted rookie Caleb Hanie came into camp, Lovie Smith probably wished that he had a three-sided coin. Rex Grossman. Kyle Orton. Caleb Hanie. Sorry if you get associated with bad influences, Caleb, but I can’t acknowledge this as a quarterbacking unit.

1.75 Quarterbacks

Well, now that the quarterbacks are settled, ready for my CliffsNotes?

NFC North=Run Games & Defense (Detroit did not get this memo).  

At least tomorrow I get to cover the…NFC West? Ugh…I really hope this gets better before it gets worse… 

UPDATE: Matt Millen has been fired. Perhaps the Lions can reach purgatory after all!